Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize