There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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