Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
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