Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
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