Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
oh god was she eating orange peels again
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
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