i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize