we're blogging at a bar
somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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