i just google imaged poop.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
