I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Randomize
