if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Randomize
