the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
