So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
