I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
You're like the curious george of whores
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
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