I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Randomize
