I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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