Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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