I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize