Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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