They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
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