People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Randomize
