that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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