Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
