yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
i came on her dog
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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