Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
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