whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Randomize
