he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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