Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Randomize
