I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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