windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Randomize
