i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
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