is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
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