Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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