Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
