It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
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