I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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