If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Such a big mess for such a small penis
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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