Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Randomize
