you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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