And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Randomize
