I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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