Don't you send me to vm
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
You've changed since you got that strap on
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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