Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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