end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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