this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
