so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
The power of my boobs compel you
All the doctor said was why
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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