Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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