I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize