six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
I DEMAND FORESKIN
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
