I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
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