ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
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