worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
Randomize
