erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
my liver is dry heaving
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Randomize
